I knew having a baby of mixed race might bring some challenges. I also knew at some point there might be someone who would think he was not my baby. Didn't realize it would happen so soon!
Today someone said, "If I saw you in the street I would assume you were the baby sitter!" Ok, now that could be a comment on how exceptionally good I look for 30 plus (:)). But then she followed that statement with, "you know because he's so light." Someone else that I know said, "People are going to think you are the nanny! He doesn't look black."
Call me colorblind, but I really don't see how awfully noticeable it is. :) I guess it's because I love the little tyke more than anything (ok cept maybe God and my husband, and I say husband because we learned in marriage class that we should put our relationship before the kids and that would make them happier etc) and from the moment he came out I focused on everything else besides his light skin and blue eyes (which I adore!).
I know I will have to deal with a lot more in the future. Especially if we end up moving to where we might be moving. Still I would offer these thoughts to anyone who plans on having a relationship with a mother whose bi-racial/multi-racial child may appear to take on more characteristics of the other race....DON"T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT IT!
I would advise you not to make comments like, "He doesn't look like you." "You look like her nanny." "No one will know he is your son." "You look like you stole that child." Etc
Besides...wait till this child starts to dance, we'll then who has the last laugh! :) ((lol, just kidding his dad dances well too))
Oh my gosh!!! I went through the exact same thing. I still get it from my family even though Zoe is looking more and more different than she looked when she was a baby.
ReplyDeleteOne girl in Ghana eveb asked me why Zoe was so white and I was so dark.
Well both of my parents are African American, but my mother is about your complexion Valdie and folks would ask her whose kids we were. My mother would respon, "mine, who ele would carry three kids around...." I think the having biracial parents probably makes these comments occur more frequently.... .
ReplyDeleteI will tell you though that neither my mom or dad were really into the whole skin color thing so I actually didn't notice that my mom and I had different complexions until someone brought it to my attention in college....
Hi :) My husband is from Tanzania and I am from Poland and we are happy parents of little boy. We are living in Poland and a lot of ppl don't believe that my kid is mine, because of skin colour (he looks like little Chocolate :) I know how you feel. Greatings from Poland :)
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